Dating a Finnish guy

Curious lady · Post by **Curious lady** » Mon Oct 21, 2013 8:19 am

Hey guys, I recently met someone from Finland when he was on vacation in the US and we hit it off immediately (tho I approached him first but from reading other posts it seems quite normal to have to make the first move lol)
Anyway, he's back in Finland and we've been talking almost everyday on Facebook (he even starts a conversation if I haven't texted him).. I'm planning a visit pretty soon so we can hang out more but I kinda would like to know if he just sees me as a friend or is interested in something more. I guess my question is should I ask him how he feels about me in a message or wait to do it in person or don't do it at all and just be patient?

Thank you for reading this and any comments are greatly appreciated!!!

**Sponsor:**

Oombongo · Post by **Oombongo** » Mon Oct 21, 2013 9:30 am

if he is grooming you for a shag then he is interested in a shag. If he interested in something more than a shag then he is interested in you.

In all seriousness, just ask him directly. That usually saves time and energy for everyone.

Curious lady · Post by **Curious lady** » Mon Oct 21, 2013 5:19 pm

Thank you for replaying! So do you think I should ask him in person or go ahead and get it out of the way now in messages?
Btw, we actually had sex when he was here so I don't think he's talking to me just to get some more but I might be wrong.

Pursuivant · Post by **Pursuivant** » Mon Oct 21, 2013 10:47 pm

It is said " a Finnish man doesn't speak or kiss" ... you got one that does both? You sure its not Justin Bieber?

Yes I think that is getting to "more than friends" but don't expect a diamond and kneeling. The question is "will you me?" or "could you suffer me?" in some awkward nature spot

Curious lady · Post by **Curious lady** » Tue Oct 22, 2013 5:38 am

Hahah that's too funny!! Well I'm not into it for a ring we are both young so no such plans at the moment but I do like him a lot

:):)

Flossy1978 · Post by **Flossy1978** » Tue Oct 22, 2013 11:13 am

Well it's clear, you've f*cked.... He wants you to visit.

Kind of clear, isn't it? He's a bit interested in more than just a shag. If he is just in it for a shag.... well, you'll then be stupid for wasting your money flying here just for that. Surely there are some dumbarses in America who could do the same for much less LOL.

Seriously... Finns can be blunt. So it's best to just ask him outright.... Do you want more or not?

If he doesn't, then why waste your money coming here?

And actually if you are travelling here, I would be a gentleman (If I were a man) and even offer to help pay some of your flight here. That would prove I was into this for more than just a shag. Relationships should go both ways...... The burden should be shared.

I honestly hope you get a good guy

There are some really nasty arse Finnish men, like in any country. Cheating seems to be rather rife in this country. Marriages are ending in divorces more than 50% of the time nowadays. Probably cause the Finnish women don't want their stupid Finnish men anymore LOL. Finnish women seem to be the dominant species here LOL. But the cheating is just something else.... Like relationships mean nothing or something. Morals seem to lack in this department. Kind of sad, really. But that's life. There are really good guys too. Decent. Decent men and decent women who don't act in this manner. So not everyone is like this.

Upphew · Post by **Upphew** » Tue Oct 22, 2013 12:30 pm

Flossy1978 wrote:Marriages are ending in divorces more than 50% of the time nowadays. Probably cause the Finnish women don't want their stupid Finnish men anymore LOL.

Or <insert nationality> women don't want their stupid <insert nationality> men anymore. You can also switch the women and men and in some cases just the other.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Divorce_demography

ajdias · Post by **ajdias** » Tue Oct 22, 2013 12:45 pm

Flossy1978 wrote: But the cheating is just something else.... Like relationships mean nothing or something. Morals seem to lack in this department.

Numbers are at about one third, for committed relationships. And both genders cheat as much.
You could say that these numbers are bad compared to countries like Saudi Arabia or Yemen, but they're not much different from other western nations.

To the OP: nobody here knows the guy and his nationality tells you less than anything else you know about him. Get to know him better.

Curious lady · Post by **Curious lady** » Wed Oct 23, 2013 6:37 am

What are some of the more popular terms of endearment used in Finland?

Oombongo · Post by **Oombongo** » Wed Oct 23, 2013 8:52 am

Curious lady wrote:What are some of the more popular terms of endearment used in Finland?

Lähdeks paneen? (favorably if said by a female)
Onpa isot tissit, saanks mä koittaa niitä?

Pursuivant · Post by **Pursuivant** » Wed Oct 23, 2013 10:29 am

Curious lady wrote:What are some of the more popular terms of endearment used in Finland?

Kulta/ kultaseni ( yes it translates to 'my preciousssssss....' Lit. my gold')

Just remember if he says you once 'I love you' he won't say it again.... expecting it at 5 minute/hour/day/month/year intervals will just leave you expecting...

Oombongo · Post by **Oombongo** » Wed Oct 23, 2013 10:35 am

Pursuivant wrote:
Curious lady wrote:What are some of the more popular terms of endearment used in Finland?

Kulta/ kultaseni ( yes it translates to 'my preciousssssss....' Lit. my gold')

like this?

Curious lady · Post by **Curious lady** » Wed Oct 23, 2013 5:19 pm

Pursuivant wrote:Just remember if he says you once 'I love you' he won't say it again.... expecting it at 5 minute/hour/day/month/year intervals will just leave you expecting...

Why do you say that? Do Finns generally not express their feelings too often?

enkeligod · Post by **enkeligod** » Wed Oct 23, 2013 5:32 pm

Curious lady wrote:
Pursuivant wrote:Just remember if he says you once 'I love you' he won't say it again.... expecting it at 5 minute/hour/day/month/year intervals will just leave you expecting...
Why do you say that? Do Finns generally not express their feelings too often?

" A trial will convince you"

Upphew · Post by **Upphew** » Wed Oct 23, 2013 9:21 pm

Curious lady wrote:
Pursuivant wrote:Just remember if he says you once 'I love you' he won't say it again.... expecting it at 5 minute/hour/day/month/year intervals will just leave you expecting...
Why do you say that? Do Finns generally not express their feelings too often?

Because he is a Finnish male.

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