Finland's cultual silence

[Pursuivant]

Probably the economizing of the words happened already during right after the Ice Age when the Proto-Finns moved over and found it feasible to keep their mouth shut and use the energy for keeping warm. The babblemouths then froze on the lake ice when they were ice-fishing (its quite windy on a lake). The silent men then slid the ones frozen stiff with their mouths gaping under the ice. And their hearts felt warm, and nobody said nothing, because everyone was thinking the same thing, peace at last. Usually foreigners not accustomed to the economy of words were traditionally given a mouthful of sticky pine sap before they enter public places so their teeth get stuck together so that decent people could have some peace and quiet. If the babbling came a nuisance the next step to cure verbal diarrea was to dip the foreigner then into a hole in the ice, or in the summer throw them into a bog, really persistent ones the tradition says if you put them in headfirst that usually starts to take effect. These days of course sticky toffee is offered. Now if the babbling comes a nuisance... theres a lot of bogs. Then again this silence does not apply to the female of the species in domestic environments, for they have a wonderful and frightening ability of speaking inhaling and exhaling... hence the archeologists excavating can tell Proto-Finnic female jawbones for their extensive wear. This also explains the early prevalence of ice-fishing and a long hunting treks.

[Russianmusicandlove]

I find most of Europe to be a lot quieter than the United States. The first time I landed in an airport in Europe, the silence of the place really shocked me (this was Vienna, Austria). My young cousins were traveling with us on this particular trip, and their mother (a Hungarian native) was constantly on their toes about being quiet, because, "Europe is quieter than America."

It sure seemed that way to me. Cafes, streets, most public places had an eery sense of calm.

Now Finns...in my experience? It really does depend on who. Most of the Finns I've known are more reserved than Americans, men being quieter. They will talk to you, if they know you, without you having to initiate the conversation. This is more true, like someone said before me, if they're intoxicated.

My girlfriend however, never ceases to amaze me with her silence. Sometimes I just want to shake her and scream at her to SAY SOMETHING! But her Finnish silence may be due to my American ceaseless talking.

[Pursuivant]

Well, if you can find something funny in a piece of news... there was a bomb that went off in the centre in 2002. It was a botched hit on an ex-wife or something like that. Anyways the car blasted right in the corner of Hotel Helka in Kamppi. There were some Italian tourists interviewed and they weren't as much upset about the bomb rather than "It was eerie silent, nobody was screaming, nobody was yelling, people were calm"...

[Cloudberry]

Yes, kind of fun but... the problem with this kind of stereotypical "portraits" is that you might end up believing in them, and consequently people will offer you exactly what you expect and nothing much else.

This whole silence-stereotype is completely beyond me. The funny thing is, even some of the chattiest people I know (=Finns) appear to believe in it, as soon as the topic of the conversation moves towards Finnishness, although nothing in their personal behaviour corresponds to that stereotype.

LOL I agree, every Finn I know or have known have been great conversationalists (even when sober!). Maybe its more a case of shyness when they don't know you. I can see how a nervous or cautious Finn would be less open. But isn't that the case with most people?

[easily-lost]

I'd rather be left out in silence when eating, reading, thinking or simply resting, and it's so irritating to be interrupted. Most Finns know how to respect personal space, which is a very valuable trait...to me though. Talking is a method of conveying ideas, if the dialogue has no meaning at all, what's the point of launching it?!

[sammy]

I'd rather be left out in silence when eating, reading, thinking or simply resting, and it's so irritating to be interrupted. Most Finns know how to respect personal space, which is a very valuable trait...to me though. Talking is a method of conveying ideas, if the dialogue has no meaning at all, what's the point of launching it?!

Well, no - talking is not merely about exchanging ideas, it also has other 'hidden' uses that have more to do with social behaviour patterns, perceived expectations of others, self-image, you name it. The degree of "exchange of information" vs "exchange of social signals" may vary from one situation to another, of course.

Especially when it comes to so-called "small talk" ... personally I'm rather bad at it but I can fully understand why some people may miss it in some situations (and that's not only 'foreigners' but some Finns as well)... to some, it's a social norm, to some it isn't.

[Bubba Elvis XIV]

I really don't agree with this "Finns don't have small talk" stuff. Finns do have small talk...it's just very different and has different 'rules' etc and the small talk is very small...Just my 2 cents.

"I'd rather be left out in silence when eating, reading, thinking or simply resting, and it's so irritating to be interrupted"

But that's not a finnish characteristic - that's pretty much universal. If you are reading or something most people hate being disturbed...of course, how annoying you find it and how you deal with the interuption is different from culture to culture and person to person. Maybe eating is a bit different as food/eating can be a very social thing.

and resting - well, hell, I don't wanna be disturbed cos then I am not resting if I am talking / listening...

It's films for me...I can't watch a film with the GF (or anyone) she wants to bang on about all sorts of crap and I want to watch the film. I really like to listen to the script and find it an important part of the film so want to hear everything....

[easily-lost]

Well, let's divide people roughly into several "categories" at first: strangers, acquaintances, friends.

Now Group 1: I don't mind "small talks" with them when in the mood of chatting, and the "small talk" here refers to "a chat for the sake of chat or to get to know people" other than asking for help, for example, directions. In general, I would expect no conversations from them.

Group 2: Just casual greetings, unless both of us want to engage in a more meaningful discussion other than a "small talk" as explained above. In most cases, I wish they didn't recognize me at all.

Group 3: Obviously we will talk a lot more than with the first two groups of people, and I'd rather save the energy and time for this sort of discussions or even debates with them.

I'm sure there is a lot more involved besides social, cultural, psychological, personal aspects etc. Of course loud, talkative (in a bad manner), rude Finns exist just like everywhere else in the world, but I can say they're not the majority here, and I like it that way!

Oh boy, how I wish people NOT to eat and talk at the same time! That's how those ugly accidents happen!

[littlefrank]

I've done a little anthropological study of my Finnish friends, they tend to make certain eye movements if they are going to be silent, so if you see a Finn making this eye movement it means they're not going to answer bloody stupid questions from bloody stupid tourists, so if you're going to say to a Finn, 'I've always wanted to come to Scandinavia' or ask 'should I bring warm clothes in the summer' etc, watch for that eye movement.

now I'm off for tea with the vicar.

[Mölkky-Fan]

It's films for me...I can't watch a film with the GF (or anyone) she wants to bang on about all sorts of crap and I want to watch the film. I really like to listen to the script and find it an important part of the film so want to hear everything....

for me this is my biggest problem here. The Finns claim they are silent and respect people's privacy etc, but why does everyone talk while watching TV? Of course they are reading subtitles while I am trying to listen to the script... it is often impossible when the wife, mother in law and sister in law and daughter are there to understand English shows. Silent my @rse!

I can understand the americans being surprised by lack of conversation, as even I am shocked when over there how everyone seems to want to talk with you... but Finnish conversation is not much different from the rest of mid and northern Europe to me. Maybe a little less, which I guess leads to the exaggerated stereotype. But as someone says above, the Finns seem to be proud of the 'silent Finn' stereotype and therefore they keep it going. Certainly the Finns I know are not silent or lacking in conversation, especially when speaking a foreign language as they have to with me .

[Jukka Aho]

:) for me this is my biggest problem here. The Finns claim they are silent and respect people's privacy etc, but why does everyone talk while watching TV? Of course they are reading subtitles while I am trying to listen to the script... it is often impossible when the wife, mother in law and sister in law and daughter are there to understand English shows. Silent my @rse!

Back when I still lived with my parents my Mom was, at times, asking me to turn down the volume on the TV because “the show you’re watching has subtitles, hasn’t it?” YEAH IT DOES MA’AM, BUT I’D STILL LIKE TO HEAR WHAT THEY’RE ACTUALLY SAYING TOO... NOT TO MENTION THE INCIDENTAL MUSIC IN SHOWS LIKE MIAMI VICE.

(Oh, and I wasn’t listening to it at a particularly loud level. It was just that she had gotten into a habit of turning the volume down a couple of notches for shows that have their dialog in some pesky foreign language...)

[Bubba Elvis XIV]

Funny stories. But yeah, it's all down to those subtitles.

One of my first experiences was when I was here for the first time in 99 and got invited to the pub to watch Men Behaving Badly...a large group of students would go down adn watch it together. After about 10 mins I got sick of everyone laughing before the punch line, the titles would obviously tell the joke before the characters did. See the problem was the large group's laughter would drown out the sound of the TV. So after a while I had to stand up and tell them all to 'STFU - I'm missing the damn jokes'...Sadly, they thought it was so funny they drowned out about the next 5 mins of the programme with more laughter and mockery!

All good fun...

Finns, silent? Bollocks....Finns don't talk much but personally find many to be very loud...not just talking but moving, closing doors, setting things down, walking, washing dishes, running water, smoking, eating, slurping coffee...like 5 million bulls in one china shop. No wonder everyone likes to go to their cottage and/or spend time alone here...

[Bubba Elvis XIV]

[ MIAMI VICE.

I tried to watch that when they re-ran it...they had a few hardcore punk bands on the show too so I was eager to see them. But couldn;t watch it at all. Sooooo bad and hasn't stood the test of time at all IMHO (unlike the A-Team which is still great!!! )

[Pale_Moonlight]

i used to be akward around my FInnish friends.. when convo seemed to dry up.. when infact it hadn't at all..

if there is somthing worth talking about, then lets talk.. if not then lets enjoy the ambient sounds of nature. i've even started to notice how many people spit complete crap out of their mouths( like this post perhaps )..a good example was in the sauna after gym tonight.. two people going on and on and on.. shhh

I find small talk pretty pointless..never been a fan of it

[Pursuivant]

i used to be akward around my FInnish friends..

I used to be awkward like that too...

...but then I started wearing clothes.