Meeting the parents (help required!!)

Lefty · Post by **Lefty** » Tue Jun 07, 2005 2:07 pm

But what should I wear???? I have never been to Finland and this will be my first time, I don't even know what is acceptable and what isn't. I have to make a good first impression on them, they are a very well respected (wealthy) family and I come from very well respected (wealthy) family, but I have always been the oddball of my family, not really into the society practices and all, they may expect laods from me and I just want to make a good impression by not offending them in anyway and also conforming to Finnish ways and customs. I'm worried because I really love my boyfriend and I dont ant there to be ant hinderances or tensions in our relationship.

their son is a "goth" and not surprisingly so am I. But I am not going to waer my goth attire, I just want something plain, simple and acceptable. (is the goth way of dress wide spread in Finland?)

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Hank W. · Post by **Hank W.** » Tue Jun 07, 2005 2:17 pm

Well, yes you see goths. Unless your bf is the bearded fellow that wears green a velvet dress one sees in the 'tunnel' I think its not bad. I'd wear something you'd wear to a job interview, bank applying for a loan etc. As in not full "vampirella", nor Marilyn Manson' crew in that music video... "tainted love"

Lefty · Post by **Lefty** » Tue Jun 07, 2005 6:44 pm

I'm not that extreme! I wear alot of black but not to the extent of looking like a vampire(ess)! a business suit, I wear that to work every day, they know what job I do so they may take offence and see it as a"business meeting". How about a dress? or skirt and sleeveless top? it hot isn't it?

Post by **neil** » Tue Jun 07, 2005 10:24 pm

antj wrote:Her father doesn't speak any english but has always gone out of his way to make me feel welcome. I was so nervous the first time I went there but that soon changed.

Did your father-in-law take you off to the sauna with a bottle of kossu? I guess this is the stereotype for first time meetings of boyfriends and father-in-law's, so whats the deal for girlfreinds and mother-in-laws?

Lefty, are you able to drink large amounts of vodka in a short space of time?

Lefty · Post by **Lefty** » Wed Jun 08, 2005 1:17 pm

I don't drink alcohol! maybe I should start, I might need a whole bottle of Finlandia vodka after the evening with the parents. (btw, I love the way you Finns say vodka, so sexy!)

Lefty · Post by **Lefty** » Fri Jun 10, 2005 3:48 am

what or where is "Suutarila"?? my boyfriend said that before they made it big, they were in "Suutarila" and I just nodded my head and said "really?" but I have no idea what he means??!!

RA · Post by RA » Fri Jun 10, 2005 7:16 am

It's a region in Northern Helsinki.

Hank W. · Post by **Hank W.** » Fri Jun 10, 2005 8:12 am

Suutarila isn't a ghetto; but it was these "behind Gods back" suburbs. Of course with the last 20-30 years and the silly prices anyplace now would cost a fortune to buy, but way back when it was cheap and took an hour by bus to get to the centre.

Lefty · Post by **Lefty** » Fri Jun 10, 2005 1:30 pm

*gasp*!!! is it true that Finnish children start school at the age of SEVEN!!! in England we begin primary schoool in september of the year you turn four years old. but as i was born in March I started when i was three and a half. so essentially, I started school at half the age my boyfriend did! they will think I'm a snob

. So in Suutarila, what sort of people might you find there? gangstas? high crime? or is it a peaceful, residential area without much industry.

RA · Post by RA » Fri Jun 10, 2005 2:46 pm

Lefty wrote: *gasp*!!! is it true that Finnish children start school at the age of SEVEN!!! in England we begin primary schoool in september of the year you turn four years old. but as i was born in March I started when i was three and a half. so essentially, I started school at half the age my boyfriend did! they will think I'm a snob . So in Suutarila, what sort of people might you find there? gangstas? high crime? or is it a peaceful, residential area without much industry.

Yes, in Finland school starts at the age of seven. But at age 6 they can go to pre-school and lots of children attend a päiväkoti or daycare etc way before this. They probably do a lot of the same stuff you did when you went to school at 3 and a half, I'd say.

Gangstas in Finland?

No! I don't think so.

Suutarila is an okay place.

korppu · Post by **korppu** » Fri Jun 10, 2005 4:02 pm

Lefty wrote:what or where is "Suutarila"?? my boyfriend said that before they made it big, they were in "Suutarila" and I just nodded my head and said "really?" but I have no idea what he means??!!

Suutarila 1970:

1968 "Pena", "Hemmu" and "Ellu" :

The "mall" in 1970:

1970:

Suutarila LADAs in 1989:

2002 winter:

The community center 1990:

There are more images of different neighbourhoods here ("english" button to the left): http://www.albumit.lasipalatsi.fi/suomi/index.html

Lefty · Post by **Lefty** » Fri Jun 10, 2005 4:27 pm

thank you so much for that link korppu, and thank you everyone! keep the information coming! It was nice to see a lot of different ethnic groups in those pictures, I had heard some things about Finns not really being "interracial" but I don't think that anymore!

korppu · Post by **korppu** » Fri Jun 10, 2005 4:47 pm

In Finland people from the next village are considered an ethnic group

luoto · Post by **luoto** » Sun Jun 12, 2005 6:50 pm

Lefty: Yes it is true. And look how more advanced the Finnish students can be compared to their English counterparrts. It puts the "Great Briton" to shame. But I do think it is quite sad that many Finnish families don't encourage their children to learn to read before going to school.

ambl · Post by **ambl** » Sun Jun 12, 2005 7:40 pm

luoto wrote:But I do think it is quite sad that many Finnish families don't encourage their children to learn to read before going to school.

They don't? In my experience pre-school children spend a lot of time with different kind of books.

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Meeting the parents (help required!!)