Drinking Spouse with baby

Mizu1993 · Post by **Mizu1993** » Sun Mar 06, 2022 1:50 pm

So my husband and I have 2 kids, one is 4 and the other one 10 month old. My husband normally goes with the baby to a friend, so I can spend time with our older daughter. But today he told me happily, that he got very drunk yesterday at his friend's house. I think this is unacceptable and told him that I can probably press charges on him, but he said that is legal to do, I don't think so. Anyways, I tried to check about this kind of case, but I haven't found anything. He has a baby with him and it's super reckless to get wasted meanwhile he should take care of our child. So is there a law or an official text which I can show him that this is not normal and not something you shouldn't do. I would have guessed this is common sense, but apparently it is not.

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FinlandGirl · Post by **FinlandGirl** » Mon Mar 07, 2022 2:51 am

Mizu1993 wrote: ↑
Sun Mar 06, 2022 1:50 pm
So my husband and I have 2 kids, one is 4 and the other one 10 month old. My husband normally goes with the baby to a friend, so I can spend time with our older daughter. But today he told me happily, that he got very drunk yesterday at his friend's house. I think this is unacceptable and told him that I can probably press charges on him, but he said that is legal to do, I don't think so. Anyways, I tried to check about this kind of case, but I haven't found anything. He has a baby with him and it's super reckless to get wasted meanwhile he should take care of our child. So is there a law or an official text which I can show him that this is not normal and not something you shouldn't do. I would have guessed this is common sense, but apparently it is not.

It is not a criminal offence if your baby cries all night in the cradle while you are sleeping completely wasted.
Many parents with real alcohol abuse problems (not just getting wasted at a friend once in a while) raise children.
In any case realistic charges would be about child custody, not criminal law.

heretostay · Post by **heretostay** » Mon Mar 07, 2022 7:50 am

If you call family services at your local municipality, they can answer these questions and help you get the information you need to speak with your husband.

Mariza · Post by **Mariza** » Sat Sep 06, 2025 8:47 pm

I dealt with this with my ex. He got drunk while watching our toddler. Where I am, there isn’t a charge for a one off unless there’s harm, but child services act if there’s a pattern or risk.We set a rule the sole carer stays sober, no exceptions, and wrote it down. If he planned to drink, I kept the baby. I logged incidents and did a call with family services.

My brother was treated at Abbeycare, detox, therapy and aftercare helped him stick to a relapse plan. A quick confidential chat with them gave me useful pointers too.

betelgeuse · Post by **betelgeuse** » Tue Sep 09, 2025 12:29 pm

FinlandGirl wrote: ↑
Mon Mar 07, 2022 2:51 am

Mizu1993 wrote: ↑
Sun Mar 06, 2022 1:50 pm
So my husband and I have 2 kids, one is 4 and the other one 10 month old. My husband normally goes with the baby to a friend, so I can spend time with our older daughter. But today he told me happily, that he got very drunk yesterday at his friend's house. I think this is unacceptable and told him that I can probably press charges on him, but he said that is legal to do, I don't think so. Anyways, I tried to check about this kind of case, but I haven't found anything. He has a baby with him and it's super reckless to get wasted meanwhile he should take care of our child. So is there a law or an official text which I can show him that this is not normal and not something you shouldn't do. I would have guessed this is common sense, but apparently it is not.
It is not a criminal offence if your baby cries all night in the cradle while you are sleeping completely wasted.
Many parents with real alcohol abuse problems (not just getting wasted at a friend once in a while) raise children.
In any case realistic charges would be about child custody, not criminal law.

Both examples above give reason to suspect abandonment. Definitely should not assume such behaviour to be legal.

"A person who renders another person helpless or abandons a helpless person in respect of whom
he or she has an obligation of care, and thereby endangers the life or health of the said person,
shall be sentenced for abandonment to a fine or to imprisonment for at most two years."

https://www.finlex.fi/api/media/statute ... %3A11.000Z

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