child wants to eat before payment?

[Flossy1978]

Well, people with small children always have snacks at home, even if they run out of everything else!

Usually they have something for their children to munch on when they go out, just incase. That's my experience anyway.

[Bavarian]

If there are two parents in the picture, one of them can buy the snacks while the other parent is with the toddler. It doesn't seem that hard.

[ajdias]

oh and biz_it, your description of your child's behaviour in post #1 is so detailed and vivid, why do you subsequently complain about people answering to that part of the post, too.

Was the lengthy explanation some attempted justification of eating things before payment, since if it was illegal for adults then the OP hoped it would be ok for hungry children throwing a tantrum?

In light of his other posts in the thread, it's more likely he's rather sensitive to feedback and was trying to avoid being subject to criticism for asking for advice. If you never had this problem it may sound odd to you, but the pain is very real...
He may not lash back as the "tiger mom against the school" on the other thread, but is less likely to post another thread in the future asking for advice.

[biz_it]

I am very much open to criticism but I don't understand what I am even being criticised for. Suggestions and opinions are always acceptable and OK but starting judging others is not OK. Telling me that this is not an acceptable practice is OK and honestly, I was not sure how it works here so I was open to both OK and not OK answers. Giving suggestions is OK but starting criticising is a bit over the top. Some of you started suggesting as If I am a careless and a thief parent knowing nothing about how to raise a child. This, what I believe, is not OK

I have roughly travelled to 50 countries before and each country has its own culture, rules and regulations. Many countries allow giving food to toddlers before payment (given that you make the payment on checkout) I have spent more time in Finland than I have in any other country but there are still many things I don't know about Finland. I was not even sure if this was considered bad here. I have given food to my baby 4 times before payment here in Finland and in all 4 times, the cashier noticed I had already opened the package but they did not mind at all.

I still went one step ahead and asked the question here just to make sure that I had followed the right practice according to the local laws. I did not ask the question for the sake of keeping doing this. This was a question that was on my mind whether I had followed the right practice or not. I don't understand why would someone start getting bashed for asking for some information. You may give your suggestions and that is totally welcome but telling me that I am encourraging bad behvaviour is totally crossing the line. Some even suggested as if I am encouraging stealing. Out of maybe 300 visits to a super store, I have done it 4 times (Paid fully for the items) and still this is your benchmark for judging my parenting abilities. Is this how you make opinions about others?

This forum has always been very useful to me and honestly this is the first time that I got dissapointed

[rinso]

This forum has always been very useful to me and honestly this is the first time that I got dissapointed

If you have visited this forum on a regular basis the way the discussion went should not have been a surprise to you.

[riku2]

followed the right practice according to the local laws.

Do you really think that the LAW will be written in such a way to allow the feeding of kids with food that hasn't been paid for yet? Put your lawyers hat on and think how that would be written in law. At what age is the cut off in this supposed law (or would it apply to anyone a bit hungry before check out)? Will this law apply to anybody with a good reason (hungry, tired kids)? How would "good reason" be written into the law? what words would be there?

When I type "food supermarket children before paying" into google none of the results point to any law that allows such a thing (this is google UK so results are mostly from UK/US/Canada/Australia). Interestingly many of the discussions there head off into the same topics discussed in this thread.

Some of the posts mention stories of those who've done it and at check out realised they'd forgotten their wallet or their card not accepted. You will be in a bit of a pickle if this happens to you and you've fed your kids already.

[biz_it]

followed the right practice according to the local laws.

Do you really think that the LAW will be written in such a way to allow the feeding of kids with food that hasn't been paid for yet? Put your lawyers hat on and think how that would be written in law. At what age is the cut off in this supposed law (or would it apply to anyone a bit hungry before check out)? Will this law apply to anybody with a good reason (hungry, tired kids)? How would "good reason" be written into the law? what words would be there?

Laws/Norms/Culture/Regular practice Whatever you call it, I wanted to know if someone has had an experience of objection from the supermarkets. Now that I think about this, the right place to ask this question could have been the information desk of the supermarkets that I regulalrly visit.

Some of the posts mention stories of those who've done it and at check out realised they'd forgotten their wallet or their card not accepted. You will be in a bit of a pickle if this happens to you and you've fed your kids already.

I have had the experience of the credit/debit card not working so I always have atleast two different cards plus some cash in my wallet so that I don't endup in the situation where I have to leave the stuff on the counter.

However, I will keep this in mind from now onwards that giving something to the toddler before payment is not a good Idea

[raskarhu]

You want me to teach a two year old kid who can't yet speak or understand the words. The only thing he understand is that food is to be eaten. I wonder if I asked how should I look after my child.

Well you didn't ask, but you did defend bad behaviour. Two is old enough to learn "no", which is why people tried to help. And yes - if your kid is eating before you pay, then it is technically stealing. But will the store make a problem with it? I don't know. They might. They might not. There was a lady in the forum here who ate some nuts before the checkout and was arrested and charged, so they do watch people who are shopping and they might get nasty So maybe just bring a snack from home in a special lunch box so that he learns the lunch box is always ok to eat?

OMG, arrested.

[raskarhu]

Few more comments

1) Am I defending my actions: No, If I was, I would not be asking here. I wanted to be sure that I don't fall under a stealing category and that is why I asked here. Wanted to know if It is considered stealing, I will absolutely stop doing it. I was a bit doubtful so wanted to be very sure

I have only done it 2/3 times and the rest of times, I have somehow managed to contain him till the payment. Why I did during those 2/3 times, that is something I know and I cannot explain it here. In those 2/3 times, the cashier knew that the pack had already been opened or food taken out but they did not say even a single word. However, I was still curious and wanted to be absolutely sure that I am not doing something wrong. If I am wrong, I will stop doing it so there is no way I was defending my actions as a customer. However, I was defending my actions as a parent and stop judging me if you don't know the situation

2) Some of you started questioning or judging my parenting here which is totally wrong. I had already explained that I am doing my best to contain him and it is getting better. However, there are situations that are unavoidable. Stop living in ideal world and realize that there are exceptions.

Finland IS the ideal world, haven't you already figured that out? Just keep calm and act according to ALL the rules Finns want you to follow and everything will be fine ... maybe

[Flossy1978]

You're really going to ask at the shop if this behaviour, to eat before paying is allowed??? Wow!

What makes your two year old more special than others, that laws should be bent for you???

[Upphew]

You want me to teach a two year old kid who can't yet speak or understand the words. The only thing he understand is that food is to be eaten. I wonder if I asked how should I look after my child.

Well you didn't ask, but you did defend bad behaviour. Two is old enough to learn "no", which is why people tried to help. And yes - if your kid is eating before you pay, then it is technically stealing. But will the store make a problem with it? I don't know. They might. They might not. There was a lady in the forum here who ate some nuts before the checkout and was arrested and charged, so they do watch people who are shopping and they might get nasty So maybe just bring a snack from home in a special lunch box so that he learns the lunch box is always ok to eat?

OMG, arrested.

Held by security while waiting for the cops is the usual way to deal with shoplifters. Cops will eventually come to check the situation.

[tuttu]

biz_it, seems you accidentally stepped into a hot topic.
that's how it goes in these online forums, people are eager to express controversial opinions.

about the law: seems i was wrong about mundraub, it doesn't exist anymore. oh well. another urban legend goes poof.

i would still insist that if i keep the evidence in plain sight and it is also otherwise clear that i have no intention of stealing, then it isn't.
but that's just me.

on a more general notice: i would not let myself be bullied into seeing myself as a criminal by those ever present supermarket rent-a-cops.

[Flossy1978]

A shop is there for shopping. Like many other services, you don't get to to use, eat, etc before you pay. Why should food shopping be anything different?

And seriously, how long are you food shopping that your child is going to starve if they don't eat straight away?

And a two year old isn't a baby, like the poster keeps saying. It's a walking, talking, active toddler.

Just keep a small bag of treats in your bag for such situations, for heaven's sake. It's not that difficult. And it take no time and little effort to think up. Rather than having some kind of sense of entitlement to flaunt laws. Really, how hard is that?

[raskarhu]

A shop is there for shopping. Like many other services, you don't get to to use, eat, etc before you pay. Why should food shopping be anything different?

And seriously, how long are you food shopping that your child is going to starve if they don't eat straight away?

And a two year old isn't a baby, like the poster keeps saying. It's a walking, talking, active toddler.

Just keep a small bag of treats in your bag for such situations, for heaven's sake. It's not that difficult. And it take no time and little effort to think up. Rather than having some kind of sense of entitlement to flaunt laws. Really, how hard is that?

Have you ever heard of the letter of the law and the spirit of the law? It really makes the difference between a society of robots and one in which the human component and context is taken into consideration.Your reaction to me is comparable to that of a religious zealot, a fundamentalist really.

[Flossy1978]

Because I choose to follow the law and use common sense??? That makes me a fundamentalist?

Well, sorry. The world is filled enough with entitled people these days. I choose not to be like that.