Registration of a child born in Finland to unmarried parents

[DickVonDyke]

Y U so Difficult Finland! %&%&

So my child was born a month back to a Finnish mom and me and other european citizen who have been cohabiting together here for three years. To the best of my knowledge and as far as Kela and anyone else relevant is concerned we were in a registered partnership but now after the child was born we get a letter saying I have to somehow book an appointment to declare paternity and whatnot.

We manage to then call them up in the one hour the phone line they gave us is open and told they need to get a translator for me and the only time that works for them means I now need to arrange time off work to satisfy the aspergers like autistic desires of some maistraatti official.

I mean seriously could this not be established at the hospital before they let me in the hold the hand of a puffing and panting woman who in the end had to have her guts pulled out and a bowling ball sized kid removed from her stomach, How did the hospital "establish paternity" then or were they not asking enough questions of who my knocked up partner was dragging into the operating room with her? Yes I'm the dad what more do they need to know than

Are you the parent of the child of XYZ Soumalainen here today?

Yes [X]
No [ ]

How complicated can it be, I get that they might need to see me in person but it seems awfully complicated and legal from the expression my partner gave me after hanging up the phone.

Sorry to rant but I'm wondering has anyone gone through this already and how much did you end up having to fork out for this pen pushers orgasm of !"#¤% paperwork. Was the translator extra as well as if I'm going to lose a days wages AND have to pay someone to translate my frustration I'm going to make sure to have a few nice remarks ready to be sure I get my moneys worth.

[onkko]

Being father is legally and financially huge deal. Only way to avoid this paper stuff is to be married when child is automatically yours.
I understand your frustration but please understand why things have to be done "right way". You dont want to end up as father of some random kid. We are talking 20+ years of financial and legal responsibilities.

[rinso]

Y U so Difficult Finland! %&%&

So my child was born a month back to a Finnish mom and me and other european citizen who have been cohabiting together here for three years. To the best of my knowledge and as far as Kela and anyone else relevant is concerned we were in a registered partnership but now after the child was born we get a letter saying I have to somehow book an appointment to declare paternity and whatnot.

We manage to then call them up in the one hour the phone line they gave us is open and told they need to get a translator for me and the only time that works for them means I now need to arrange time off work to satisfy the aspergers like autistic desires of some maistraatti official.

I mean seriously could this not be established at the hospital before they let me in the hold the hand of a puffing and panting woman who in the end had to have her guts pulled out and a bowling ball sized kid removed from her stomach, How did the hospital "establish paternity" then or were they not asking enough questions of who my knocked up partner was dragging into the operating room with her? Yes I'm the dad what more do they need to know than

Are you the parent of the child of XYZ Soumalainen here today?

Yes [X]
No [ ]

How complicated can it be, I get that they might need to see me in person but it seems awfully complicated and legal from the expression my partner gave me after hanging up the phone.

Sorry to rant but I'm wondering has anyone gone through this already and how much did you end up having to fork out for this pen pushers orgasm of !"#¤% paperwork. Was the translator extra as well as if I'm going to lose a days wages AND have to pay someone to translate my frustration I'm going to make sure to have a few nice remarks ready to be sure I get my moneys worth.

Like onkko said, paternity has legal consequences. It is not wise to do the paperwork in a stressed situation where everybody is focused on something else.

[Rip]

we were in a registered partnership

In this country that is (for a while still) for gay couples, so I doubt you were.

I mean seriously could this not be established at the hospital before they let me in the hold the hand of a puffing and panting woman

Well, you were bit unlucky here. It can be, but the new law enabling that became valid only on 1st of January 2016.
http://www.finlex.fi/fi/laki/alkup/2015 ... idm2259648

How did the hospital "establish paternity" then or were they not asking enough questions of who my knocked up partner was dragging into the operating room with her?

The hospital does not really care. Typically that person is of course the father of the new baby, but it is up to the mother. If she does not want her legal husband there, guards will keep him out if necessary, while she can have any other person for support if she wishes.

[DickVonDyke]

Thanks for the replies.

Regarding our "partnership" I'm not sure of the exact term but when I look at my personal details on the kela webpages it shows my baby mama as spouse since x date many years back.
When she was studying we were in a close enough relationship for them to consider my wages as part of our household income and expect me to supplement her student money but I guess registered relationship might be the proper term. In any case we are pretty much treated as if we were married in the eyes of the social system but I guess not in law then?

Yes I'm also well aware of the legal and lifelong contract being a parent is but lets not pretend this isn't a more complicated process in Finland than it is in many other countries where you can simply claim your child at birth in the hospital. If anything they are making it more difficult for me to do something I'm sure they would rather more less interested dads would do in the first place and presumably making me pay through the nose for the pleasure.

Looking at it objectively if this was just a casual "love child" where I didn't really have any interest in the mother I'd be very close to saying "@#$% this" right now so it begs the question why are maistraatti seemingly working against their own interests but as RIP pointed out it's good to read they seem to be changing the process so it can be done at birth.

[betelgeuse]

Regarding our "partnership" I'm not sure of the exact term but when I look at my personal details on the kela webpages it shows my baby mama as spouse since x date many years back.
When she was studying we were in a close enough relationship for them to consider my wages as part of our household income and expect me to supplement her student money but I guess registered relationship might be the proper term. In any case we are pretty much treated as if we were married in the eyes of the social system but I guess not in law then?

You are what is called "avopuoliso" in Finnish. In English speaking countries the closest equivalent is common-law marriage. Whether being avopuoliso matters varies by legal act.

Yes I'm also well aware of the legal and lifelong contract being a parent is but lets not pretend this isn't a more complicated process in Finland than it is in many other countries where you can simply claim your child at birth in the hospital. If anything they are making it more difficult for me to do something I'm sure they would rather more less interested dads would do in the first place and presumably making me pay through the nose for the pleasure.

Looking at it objectively if this was just a casual "love child" where I didn't really have any interest in the mother I'd be very close to saying "@#$% this" right now so it begs the question why are maistraatti seemingly working against their own interests but as RIP pointed out it's good to read they seem to be changing the process so it can be done at birth.

The previous Isyyslaki was written at a time when only 10% of children were born out of wedlock. Officials have to follow the law. Basically this was the case where the legislature should have acted faster to adapt to changes in society.

[Londonchris]

Our 3 sons have all been born in Finland & we are unmarried.
You just both go & sign the paperwork stating you are both the parents & responsible for the child....just do what you need to do, it`s not a big drama.