Question: How to behave in Finland?

[joanmanuel]

No, it is not true. But a cup of coffee is a more usual invitation. And don´t be surprised if the girl digs up her wallet and insists on paying her drink.

well for example here is a huge difference with Peru, here the guy should pay almost everything: food, drinks, cabs (if you do not have your own car) and a lot of other stuff (and in the end you just get rewarded with a kiss, to get laid is the biggest reward )

[joanmanuel]

about the hugging and genital grabbing described, well uhmmm... we, the peruvians, are a little bit chauvinism (sorry, but I do not know the right word, in Spanish is "machista") so if you do that here (except that you are really really drunk) you will be considered as a gay ("cabro" in slang)

I really respect all the cultures so much, and for that reason is that I was asking all these questions for not being considered rude or disrespectful to Finland people, by the way I had the opportunity to travel there for a week at most and I really like it too much, it was really peaceful and beautiful

I suppose that one of the biggest obstacle when one visit a foreign country is how to interact with the opposite sex (in my case girls), I remember that once when I was in Joburg I felt a little bit homesick and wanted to distract my mind going to the movies or going to eat something with some girl (only that and not to have a date), but I messed all it up: first I invited a Indian girl, she told me that she could not go out with me, because it was not allowed; when I tried to invite a white girl she thought that it was really a date, and when I invited a black girl she was more cool, but the problem is that after I invited her, she told almost half of my classroom that I wanted to be with her
at the end I finished buying a bottle of wine and drink it with a few good cigars alone, geez!

[EP]

genital grabbing described

Don´t take everything literally.

[Bubba Elvis XIV]

a question for you.

If you found Finland hard why are you coming back?

I would agree that Finns are quite serious, they are a bit uptight and their humour can be different...not bad or wrong but different. But all you do is the same as you would do in Peru....Find the people who are like you /similiar to you. Quite a simple solution really. I'm sure you don't hang around with people in Peru that are a direct opposite to you, with different interests and beliefs.

[Bubba Elvis XIV]

and if you're lucky maybe they'll grab your genitals too!!!

There’s even a word for that: homokahmaisu. (Look it up on Google if you don’t believe me.)

Really....? That is great! Really, I am so impressed.

Ah but EP, being female you won't know these things. It's strictly between us males and as I said what happens in the bar...

But what's up with all these posts "I am moving to Finland...can you tell me how to get with a woman?".

[joanmanuel]

a question for you.

If you found Finland hard why are you coming back?

well my friend as I told in a previous post, I really really loved the city, I was in Helsinky by the way; and for a detailed list why I would like to travel there, here are a few reasons:
1. It has huge technological and scientific advances, I love to make research
2. The city is peaceful, clean air, clean food, clean water; everything is so well ordered, I really like it
3. Their universities are in the top charts of the world rankings
4. The ladies are really beautiful

[Bubba Elvis XIV]

Right, right....

Well, I am sure you'll be fine - just gotta find the people who are similiar to you. As cory kinda said, being a student you should meet people quite easily as long as you don't go home, lock the door and only leave the place for lectures / lessons...

I think sports are good, not so much gyms as people wanna train and the only time you get to chat is in the changing room but an actual sport or activity is always a good way of hooking up with people and then you can use those people to widen you social network...of course, if you're good at the sport/activity then people will want to make friends with you! And you always have some point of conversation too.

I always think it's good to keep away from your fellow country people / language speakers...Find the locals or other foreigners.

If a miserable, misanthrope that has limited social skills like me can make friends then so can you./

[Pursuivant]

I knew a Peruvian guy, a bit older like me when I was in college here, so we hanged out sometimes at the student parties looking how the modern youth is so wild. He was'nt so macho as some Mexicans not to speak about Venezualans but he'd been here for a while, so I guess the mountain air is good for you I think he had stopped worrying a long time ago.

BTW that Joburg thing made me larf... I think you find Finns and Boers a bit the same. Same kind of jokes and a bit of the same attitudes sometimes. And a weird language.

[nerakrose]

And never EVER start a conservation in a mens toilet

but that worked for me

[enk]

Actually, if you're coming to Finland to study, the likelihood is that you will only meet other
foreigners and these are the same people with whom you'll end up going out. It was a real
shocker to me when I first moved here to study at the University of Helsinki. That said,
when I studied at TTKK (whatever the heck its name is again nowadays) in Tampere, almost
everyone I knew was a Finn because there just weren't foreigners there at that time
besides the Chinese contingent, who only hung around with each other.

-enk

[CatNip]

in Finland is disrespectful to invite a girl for a drink in a bar? is that really true?

No, it is not true. But a cup of coffee is a more usual invitation. And don´t be surprised if the girl digs up her wallet and insists on paying her drink.

Hey, we women typically pay our own drinks in this country. Better to check this out in advance. It might be even considered insulting sometimes if you pay food ot drinks for a woman in Finland. If you don't know how to take this up with your friend/date, better to ask directly and say you don't know how the things are working in Finland.

My advice would be to stick on the truth on everyhting you say. We Finns respect honesty, and if you loose it once, it's hard to get back. No need for machostyle of acts or talks, we look down these acts.

[Oombongo]

Hey, we women typically pay our own drinks in this country. Better to check this out in advance. It might be even considered insulting sometimes if you pay food ot drinks for a woman in Finland. If you don't know how to take this up with your friend/date, better to ask directly and say you don't know how the things are working in Finland.

Well, date in these days expects you to pay her bill. Either things are changing or we foreigners dudes are scammed

[joanmanuel]

That said,
when I studied at TTKK (whatever the heck its name is again nowadays) in Tampere, almost
everyone I knew was a Finn because there just weren't foreigners there at that time
besides the Chinese contingent, who only hung around with each other.

-enk

Yep, I think I will have the same problem; I have checked my classmates and almost everybody is from Finland (I deduce from the names ) and there are also some Chinese people, but when I was in Joburg those Chinese always hang around with each other, speaking their own language and when one even tries to speak English to them they do not understand it very well. It was really hard to me to speak with them, besides some Chinese girls were very beautiful

[joanmanuel]

My advice would be to stick on the truth on everyhting you say. We Finns respect honesty, and if you loose it once, it's hard to get back. No need for machostyle of acts or talks, we look down these acts.

Yes, one friend of mine, told me that Finnish people love honesty; I really think that is great.
But, by the way, how one can "flirt" (I do not know if it is the right word, in Spanish is like "enamorar") with a Finnish girl? maybe some of our "latino" ways will seem too silly or strange; any advice about it?

[Bubba Elvis XIV]

Finns respect honesty as long as you don't tell them something they don't want to hear or rock the boat.

A lot of Finns don't take compliments too well...they just don't do it much so if you pay someone a compliment they get confused and arent sure how to respond. Need to know that for flirting...Can't over do it!