Is not it strange?

[Meeks]

People don't change from black to white overnight, they change slowly, and they keep it secret. And one day the secret is let out, and you finally get to see what's been kept from you for such a long time. If people were only more open with each other, and communicated, then results such as this would be less common. Don't ever think everything is ok, even for a moment, because that's when everything falls apart.

[Vallu]

I think the worst of people - and things. Always expecting and preparing for a disaster. Therefore I get only pleasant surprises

This sounds so familiar to me......I think the same way!

[mx2106]

well Hank, thank you but i didnt post the note here to get help. just to open the subject that people you might know for x years and think their are your friends, in reality are not!
and it is very bad.
of course i have arranged everything by muself, but this is not the issue. The issue is that my opinion about him changed and as the result i dont want to see him again anymore. never.

i think he was just joking, possibly mimicking your bf...

[sammy]

I think the worst of people - and things. Always expecting and preparing for a disaster. Therefore I get only pleasant surprises

This sounds so familiar to me......I think the same way!

Naah... I wouldn't vouch for pessimism... it's of no use in the end anyway

[mx2106]

I think the worst of people - and things. Always expecting and preparing for a disaster. Therefore I get only pleasant surprises

This sounds so familiar to me......I think the same way!

same here.

[mx2106]

I'm sure you have your reasons. It was meant for asking people not to criticize whom they don't know.

Well you smell like a goat and have a hairy pimple on your behind and your nosehairs make shuffling sounds when you snore at night

you are baaaad, i think Mardy has a very good point here. yet i do remember my finnish boyfriend has a hairy pimple on his back. maybe all finnish men are like this

[mx2106]

Now when Im moving to Helsinki after 20 days and need most of all some moral help and support, I discovered that I have no friends at all in my life.
It is so depressive.

Kristiinafin, I am very sorry for what happened. But no matter what happened, you have to be strong and independent. Try not to rely even psychologically on your boyfriend. and don't feel disappointed on men too.
Calm down and be strong. do your things one bye one. you will be fine and you will find your Mr. Right too.

[Vallu]

I think the worst of people - and things. Always expecting and preparing for a disaster. Therefore I get only pleasant surprises

This sounds so familiar to me......I think the same way!

Naah... I wouldn't vouch for pessimism... it's of no use in the end anyway

Hmm....maybe it's no use, but I find it helpful somehow.....maybe it's just illusion....but it feels a bit better....... who knows!

[Vallu]

I'm sure you have your reasons. It was meant for asking people not to criticize whom they don't know.

Well you smell like a goat and have a hairy pimple on your behind and your nosehairs make shuffling sounds when you snore at night

you are baaaad, i think Mardy has a very good point here. yet i do remember my finnish boyfriend has a hairy pimple on his back. maybe all finnish men are like this

My Finnish boyfriend doesn't have any hairy pimple on his back....at least so far!

[mx2106]

Well you smell like a goat and have a hairy pimple on your behind and your nosehairs make shuffling sounds when you snore at night

you are baaaad, i think Mardy has a very good point here. yet i do remember my finnish boyfriend has a hairy pimple on his back. maybe all finnish men are like this

My Finnish boyfriend doesn't have any hairy pimple on his back....at least so far!

haha. you have to be patient. there will be in the short future

[Hank W.]

Calm down and be strong. do your things one bye one.

Rent the movie She-Devil

[kristiinafin]

I think the worst of people - and things. Always expecting and preparing for a disaster. Therefore I get only pleasant surprises

This sounds so familiar to me......I think the same way!

me too, actually, in all life spheres!

[kristiinafin]

Now when Im moving to Helsinki after 20 days and need most of all some moral help and support, I discovered that I have no friends at all in my life.
It is so depressive.

Kristiinafin, I am very sorry for what happened. But no matter what happened, you have to be strong and independent. Try not to rely even psychologically on your boyfriend. and don't feel disappointed on men too.
Calm down and be strong. do your things one bye one. you will be fine and you will find your Mr. Right too.

Thank you, thats actually what i want to do, its just as he offered me(in words) help, i thought i have right to ask...
but when it came to reality... "you must do it on your own".
i feel bad that i even asked cause usually i never ask for anything.

[kristiinafin]

Kristiina, I don't know you or him, yet I'd like to raise a voice against the chorus, just to say that we (the forum-ers) cannot really judge him basing all on your post.
You wrote your version of the story, and I trust you that it is real. But we don't know anything about the motivations that lead him to behave so harshly. If you know were his friend for 5 years, he cannot be such a monster; something must have changed... Well, people change, too, but they cannot change from white to black in such a short time.
Maybe he is very disappointed that your love story ended, this was the first thing that I thought when reading your post. Or he realized you are not the right woman from him, yet he loves you, and this causes him a this feeling of "love & hate" towards you.

Well, this post was not meant for you; I'm sure you have your reasons. It was meant for asking people not to criticize whom they don't know.

The same facts can be seen under totally different lights, and the only real light is inside men's heart.

Wow, I'm ashamed of myself, better to return to my real self.

yes maybe he has his own reasons, but why then he told me "if you ever need something, im ready to do". stupid saying.
And i dont think that he thinks im wrong person, because he still talks about rejoining... being back together. he doesnt even like the idea that i will live in helsinki alone cause he knows that if i go in the streets, guys are after me (sorry saying it here, i know its stupid, but it is so).
anyway he knows that it would take for me not even one day to find someone. ok to find Mr Right takes long time, but he is very jealous and he want us to be back asap! maybe to close me at home
anyway i saw many negative things about his personality lately and this what hapened now was the last point.
he justifies himself as "you are independent woman, you come here as you want it, not me and you must do all alone".
at the same time when im in helsinki he calls me every one hour asking where, with whom i am and what im doing.
no discos, no going out with out him... thats how he wants. so i dont think he is thinking im wrong person.
he just doesnt want to take responsibility but wants to control.
nooooooooooooooooooooo kiiiiitttttooooossssssss

[Vallu]

at the same time when im in helsinki he calls me every one hour asking where, with whom i am and what im doing.
no discos, no going out with out him... thats how he wants. so i dont think he is thinking im wrong person.
he just doesnt want to take responsibility but wants to control.

Kristiinafin........but is he really sane? I mean, how can somebody behave that way..... he claims he cares for you, he calls you all the time but....he is not ready to help you even a bit, after you moved to a strange country..... I am speachless.....and once more, I am on your side!