Opportunity/threat to once live in Finland?

[Hank W.]

Heck, I would leave yesterday. The farther the hotter the better.
Now the only regrets I have is coming back, but how was I supposed to know what the true nature of a Finnish woman was? I don't cope with Finnish women because I understand what they are complaining about all the time. And they don't like the "shut up" -approach I have to complaining. Complaining is forbidden in my house and in a 5m radius around me at any times.

Foreign men don't understand Finnish, and Finnish women are too shy with the grammar to nag as profusely. After 2-3 years in Finland after the foreign man starts to understand the woman's nagging there is a divorce. Statistically proved.

But now I need to go get more beer, as my work laptop burned the HDD and I'm on a forced vacation. I should have a dram of whiskey now that HIFK lost to SaiPa.

[phhm]

Exactly. If you really want to live abroad, with the option of returning to Finland someday, I would maybe think about finding a Finnish guy who wouldn't mind living in other places or a person who has ties to Finland (i.e. a parent, grandparent) but is from another country that interests you. It may be tough to find, but they are out there.

Unfortunately you can't just place an order and receive by return mail a man you can love AND is Finnish or has ties to Finland.

[Hank W.]

You can't have the cake and eat it too

[phhm]

ISorry for the brutal question but where is your place in this picture?

Well I guess he would be happier having a woman he loves in addition to having a place, a job and a team he loves (and not being alone).

1) Where did he spend the weekend? What he did during his stay here to learn something about Finland?

BTW: he has concerns in how 'natural' Finland is. Does he show any interest in how 'cultural' Finland is?

Well, the weekend was in Vantaa and Helsinki, my part of Finland.

During summer vacation, we did lots of things:

- three days in Helsinki, f. ex. Café Ursula, museum of photography, national museum and a picnic with my friends in Suomenlinna (beautiful weather)
- sauna, swimming in a small lake and socializing at the cottage of my brother's parents in law about 100 km from helsinki (great weather, great water)
- boat ride just the two of us to Kaunissaari, an island in Helsinki (weather was fabulous)
- Kerimäki church and opera in Savonlinna, night at Valamo monastery
- trekking, camping and taking pictures in a national park (we were supposed to go to Eastern Finland but it was pouring down there so we drove towards the West for beautiful weather, it was a bit cold during the night but otherwise it was beautiful)
- another "home place" of my family in the Tampere region, visiting my godfather and godmother at their farm
- afternoon in Tampere
- smoke sauna, swimming in a lake and socializing at the summer cottage of some family
- a countryside feast around the same area with funny competitions and lots of old tractors
- fishing, boating and cottage life at our summer cottage on the South Western coast (the weather was beautiful)
- a classical concert at the music festival in the pretty nearby town, driving the boat back to the cottage
- visiting family who live in the old part of Rauma
- barbeque and sauna evening in my parents' garden, repeating the competitions learned at the countryside feast and afterwards taking the car to the nearest lake for a night swim
- a boat ride on our boat from Helsinki to Porvoo and back (the weather was splendid again)

[pierrot]

So he got the full program of a lovely summer in Finland and if he still can't imagine living in Finland, then the case is quite clear.
Some people simply don't like Finland and what it has to offer, and its therefore unwise to try to bring them here as this would break any relationship sooner or later due to an unhappy partner.

[mumboman]

Well I'm going to disagree with you on the finnish woman is shy Hank. My finnish woman is quite capable of nagging profusely breathing in and out even though she's not quite capable with the language.

[Hank W.]

Allright, but as you've stayed with her so far it means you're "acclimatized" to it. Those guys who are still in HBS and the "initial bliss" get a rude welcome.

BTW I agree on teh "French is French" issue. My sis after all lives in Varsailles

[mumboman]

alcohol sometimes helps with the acclimation but also brings more nagging. and apparently I'm myself quite difficult(I have a hard time beleiving this myself as I seem quite laid back) Though I will agree with the you on the poor bastards with the HBS, they have no idea whats going to take place once they get to know their hot blonde other.

[Hank W.]

I think you know why I am a wee bit harsh towards the newbies, its more merciful to kill the want to come over in Ryanair than to have to take the frozen git behind the sauna

[sinikala]

Ok, I understand the winter can make you tired. I have difficulties believing nowhere else has downfalls. Look for compensation elsewhere! No one says you have to stay indoors for seven months (which is an exaggeration).

Actually you did - with a bottle of wine and a friend. Finland has good weather from May to September. October to April generally sucks

Go to theatre or for a few laps on a light up skiing track.

I've been here long enough, I still don't go to theatre much, try as I might as I simply can't follow it in real time, we stick to concerts and ballet. How many months of skiing do you get in Hki? 2-3? The snow in Helsinki comes and goes a couple of times in the winter, the rest of the time there's either no snow or slush.

"agree that at least up to Kuopio, the geography of inner Finland is monotonous, flat and repetetive, I miss having a 3d landscape,"

I think you should have a closer look. Move from looking at big 3D forms to paying attention to changes in light, seasons, colors, details, smells, from large scale to small scale. I think a vast open lake is a pretty grand view, even if horizontal rather than vertical.

Each to his own, pine forests and lakes bore the arse off me, you've seen one, you've seen them all... my folks live within a stone's throw of Windemere and Coniston = lakes + mountains = beats the pine lined Finnish lakes into a cocked hat.

Nature in the south of Finland is plentiful and unspoilt, but ultimately lacks variety, you can find that in many other countries. I'm sure its very interesting up in Lapland, but that is not what you find around Hki.

During summer vacation, we did lots of things:

- three days in Helsinki, f. ex. Café Ursula, museum of photography, national museum and a picnic with my friends in Suomenlinna (beautiful weather)
- sauna, swimming in a small lake and socializing at the cottage of my brother's parents in law about 100 km from helsinki (great weather, great water)
- boat ride just the two of us to Kaunissaari, an island in Helsinki (weather was fabulous)
- Kerimäki church and opera in Savonlinna, night at Valamo monastery
- trekking, camping and taking pictures in a national park (we were supposed to go to Eastern Finland but it was pouring down there so we drove towards the West for beautiful weather, it was a bit cold during the night but otherwise it was beautiful)
- another "home place" of my family in the Tampere region, visiting my godfather and godmother at their farm
- afternoon in Tampere
- smoke sauna, swimming in a lake and socializing at the summer cottage of some family
- a countryside feast around the same area with funny competitions and lots of old tractors
- fishing, boating and cottage life at our summer cottage on the South Western coast (the weather was beautiful)
- a classical concert at the music festival in the pretty nearby town, driving the boat back to the cottage
- visiting family who live in the old part of Rauma
- barbeque and sauna evening in my parents' garden, repeating the competitions learned at the countryside feast and afterwards taking the car to the nearest lake for a night swim
- a boat ride on our boat from Helsinki to Porvoo and back (the weather was splendid again)

Sounds great (except having to hang out with all your distant relatives)... now try to imagine doing that in winter and you will perhaps understand where his gut feeling comes from.

Finns pride themselves and Finland prides itself on the outdoor life, summer at a shed by lake in a forest in the arse end of nowhere, sauna and a dip followed by makara and a mäyräkoira of Karhu.

You were raised on it... time for a wakeup call... it's not that great. Finns do it because outside Hki there's feck all else to do here. It's nice once in a while but wouldn't be the deciding factor to move here.

I moved here for the job, I stayed here for my wife. If we could both get good jobs elsewhere, like Hank, you wouldn't see my arse for dust.

[Hank W.]

And I've got the bloody farm to tend as well...

[mumboman]

I'll agree with you there Hank newbies really need to think why they are moving here and if there skills are marketable here. I'm only one of 3 foreign guys living in the Kuopio area that came here for work that I know. But according to my girlfriend there may be more. If he doesn't have work before he gets here he's not finding it, at least outside of keha 3. Finland isn't neccessarily a horrible place you could always move to Saskatchewan, but if the guy doesn't have work here do you really want to be here.

[maxxfi]

Well, the weekend was in Vantaa and Helsinki, my part of Finland.

During summer vacation, we did lots of things:
...

Well, it sounds like a nice program (though, you missed going to the only parts of Finland where there are significant hills )
So he saw Finland nature at its best, and he didn't like it. How about when he'll see at its worst?

Then again, so far we only talked about natural environment. What did he say about Finns / Finnish culture and way-of-life ?

[Hank W.]

Did we have culture?

[phhm]

Well, it sounds like a nice program (though, you missed going to the only parts of Finland where there are significant hills )
So he saw Finland nature at its best, and he didn't like it. How about when he'll see at its worst?

Then again, so far we only talked about natural environment. What did he say about Finns / Finnish culture and way-of-life ?

In my opinion, you have to have something wrong in the head not being thrilled by Finland after that summer holiday.

Actually he says his reaction to Finland was neutral. He's negative just about spending too many vacations there and living there. He wants to live his life according to his preferences and choices! On the other hand he says we should live where we both want to live, only it's out of the question he's going anywhere before several years and then if his career requires he move to the US for a while...

I told him he should've told me (and any other woman) from the beginning that "Achtung!" if we are to be together YOU'l have to join me and you had better not have any projects of your own because you'll just have to accomodate to MY choices. What he would really need to do is take the time machine at least a hundred years back.

I don't think he has an opinion about the Finnish way of life or about Finns. He has to admit everybody was really nice. He usually appreciates things like sincerity, punctuality, functionality, informality...

What is this thing about hills anyways. Finland is not exceptionally flat.