Hei Everyone
I arrived from Scotland in June 2007 with Finnish partner (not married, nor ever likely to be
) and our 2 kids, both born in Scotland. The only major inconvenience I faced in the first couple of months was a perceived fascist public service. Everyone in the public service sector went out of their way to be rude, unhelpful and unashamedly bare faced bureaucratic ball busters. Not because I was foreign, British or any other nationalistic bent but because I had the temerity to move to Suomi and be linguistically challenged. I was constantly being sent from pillar to post then back to pillar, forwarded to post and so on (now Pursuivant, before you get your knickers in a twist I have since dealt with loads of nice PSW).
The worst offenders by a long country mile were EURES. I went along to see them on my second day here to seek employment advice, not to claim any benefits whatsover and the lady I spoke with would have cowed Josef Stalin. I really wished I had taped the conversation but from what I remember it went something like this:
Me - Hi I've just recently moved to Suomi and I'm looking for a job. Can you offer any advice?
EURES demon - Can you speak Finnish?
Me - No
E d - Well, there you go. How do you expect to get a job if you don't speak Finnish.
Me - I'm not fussy, I'm prepared to consider anything.
E d - But you can't speak Finnish.
Me - Ok. We've established that I can't speak Finnish. However, their must be something, anything that doesn't require Finnish language skills
E d - (Sighs loudly then checks computer for possible vacancies) Would you be prepared to wash dishes (she asks in a really condescending manner)?
Me - Yup, absolutely. I wouldn't mind that. Why? Is there a vacancy?
E d - Yes
Me - Brilliant, I'd like to apply for it
E d - (Looks at me with a winning, nasty smile) Sorry but it says here that you must speak Finnish
Me - (My turn to sigh and raise my voice slightly) Ok, can you at least give me some advice or job seeking tips that would help?
E d - No, there's nothing I can do to help. Come back when you've learned the language.
Me - You work for EURES right? I'm a citizen of the EU so you are employed to assist and aid me find employment, right? So, would you please help me find a job?
E d - (This part really happened) I'll tell you what. I'll just grab my jacket and take you outside and get you a job. How about that?
Me - (Stunned) You are the nost unhelpful PSW I have ever met in my life. In Britain you would be sacked or at least severely censured for your attitude and behaviour.
E d - (Nonchalantly) Would you like to talk with my manager?
Me - Yes please. Does he speak English?
E d - No
In the end she relented slightly. I told her that I had heard Itella/Posti had jobs available for early morning delivery work. She went to the trouble of finding Itella's headquarters address and advised me to go there and apply. I cycled the 8km to get there only to be told that I had to apply online. They would only accept online applications. So the EURES demon won in the end. Although, I did get the job of Helsingin Sanomat lehden jakajaa ( How is that for an impressive sounding title) and I'm still enjoying it over 2 years later (that's another story in itself).
Ultimately, my advice about obtaining KELA number is to stop whinging and
get a job, any freaking job.
"There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge."
