Siblings sharing a room

przejoan · Post by **przejoan** » Wed Mar 12, 2008 9:59 am

Hi, I'm curious if anyone has some thoughts/opinions about siblings sharing a room. We have 2 boys - 4.5 yrs and 1.5 yrs - and they currently have separate rooms, quite small so mainly for sleeping. They play mostly in our living room. We are moving to a new house soon, and are trying to decide whether to have them share 1 bigger bedroom / playroom, or have them in 2 smaller separate rooms. My husband is really keen on the idea of them sharing, he thinks it's fun and good for bonding. I am not so sure. Does anyone have any advice?

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catfish78 · Post by **catfish78** » Wed Mar 12, 2008 10:49 am

My little ones share a room right now, they are 10 months and 4. And they will continue to share a room for the foreseen future. Growing up with my younger brother, 15 months apart, we shared a room until I was 13. We got along fine. We didn't start to really fight with each other till after we got separate rooms, weird.

Hank W. · Post by **Hank W.** » Wed Mar 12, 2008 12:21 pm

Hrmpf... should I say here something about my dad sharing the bed... actually a pullable sofa with his brother in a room the family slept together along with two boarders. Yay, poor working class background

EP · Post by EP » Wed Mar 12, 2008 1:07 pm

I shared a room with my sister all the years we lived at home, that is 19 of them. I think most Finns have shared a room with one or more siblings. My neighbour has 5 kids, 3 share a room, and 2 share another one. Usually it is "a big ones room" and "a small one´s room" or "a boys´room" and "a girls´room".

Rosamunda · Post by **Rosamunda** » Wed Mar 12, 2008 6:14 pm

When we lived in Budapest the 3 boys shared a bedroom and they had a separate playroom on the same floor, and a tiny bathroom. So it was almost like a mini-apartment for the kids

It had huge advantages.... like being able to leave the playroom in a mess when they went to bed. I think they really enjoyed all sleeping in the same room and we never had any problems. Though, I must add that they were all on "regular" school days so were getting up and going out at the same time each morning. I think siblings sharing works great if the kids have a similar routine. If one of them has to get up, get dressed, get out earlier than the others then it doesn't work so well. My three boys are quite close in age (only 4 years between them) so I think we put them all to bed at the same time and let them read for a while before lights out. It's a bit more complicated if one wants to read and the other is already asleep.

richard berman · Post by **richard berman** » Wed Mar 12, 2008 8:29 pm

My two girls share a room 6 and 3 years and it is so sweet when they go to bed, we sometimes stand behind the door to hear what they are talking about , and for the last few weeks they tell each other that they love them , brings a tear to the eye

Mölkky-Fan · Post by **Mölkky-Fan** » Wed Mar 12, 2008 9:15 pm

richard berman wrote:My two girls share a room 6 and 3 years and it is so sweet when they go to bed, we sometimes stand behind the door to hear what they are talking about , and for the last few weeks they tell each other that they love them , brings a tear to the eye

You had better get out of that habit: soon they will discuss how much they hate you, what they have done with their boyfriends, bitch about their friends, smoking, parties, drugs, sex, rock and roll etc... or worse still they will catch you listening and never speak to you again!

Mölkky-Fan · Post by **Mölkky-Fan** » Wed Mar 12, 2008 9:17 pm

EP wrote:I shared a room with my sister all the years we lived at home, that is 19 of them. I think most Finns have shared a room with one or more siblings. My neighbour has 5 kids, 3 share a room, and 2 share another one. Usually it is "a big ones room" and "a small one´s room" or "a boys´room" and "a girls´room".

Until I re-read your message I thought you shared a room with your 19 sisters!

...or maybe it was my fantasies taking over!

sarael · Post by **sarael** » Wed Mar 12, 2008 9:19 pm

i shared a bedroom with my younger brother from when i was 4( he was 1) till i was 7½( he was 4½) and before that our whole family shared a bedroom, not because we didn't have enough space( i/my brother and i always had a separate playroom), but because that was what worked the best for us. i loved sharing a bedroom with my brother and we never had any problems with that, i remember our parents once asking if we wanted to change the sleeping arrangements to give us our own rooms and we both said no

! then we moved and our new house had a lot smaller rooms, so it was easier for both of us to get our own little bedrooms...

EP · Post by EP » Wed Mar 12, 2008 11:19 pm

Until I re-read your message I thought you shared a room with your 19 sisters!

Hah, no. But my MOTHER had 11 sisters. I just don´t know if they shared a room or not.

But to przejoan: I think I would have felt lonely sleeping alone. We had a bunk bed, and I slept in the upper one (being 1 year older I had some rights). My sister had nightmares, and she never had to creep into our parents bed because all she had to do was to wake me up, and I would crawl down from my high seat.

I have a boy and a girl. They shared a room till they were 10 and 12. And we often found them in the morning sleeping in one bed.

Richard · Post by **Richard** » Wed Mar 12, 2008 11:21 pm

EP wrote:
Until I re-read your message I thought you shared a room with your 19 sisters!
Hah, no. But my MOTHER had 11 sisters.

Any brothers? or 12 kids all girls?

enk · Post by **enk** » Wed Mar 12, 2008 11:23 pm

EP wrote:Hah, no. But my MOTHER had 11 sisters.

Is 11 some magic number or is it just when the woman poops out from
giving birth so many times? My grandma was 1 of 11 (not just girls though

)
and so is my MIL (most of the males died in wars). Why not 12? Or 10?

-enk

sammy · Post by **sammy** » Wed Mar 12, 2008 11:30 pm

When we were kids, me and my little brother (3.5 years younger than me) shared our room for years, and that was okay - can't remember having any feelings of not having a space of my own... actually in one apartment -we moved about quite a bit- had two small rooms of which the other one was the "sleeping room" and the other was the "play room", both shared, that was nice. It also gave me the opportunity to enjoy children's books for another round as Mom read them aloud to lil bro. Of course I was "too old to really enjoy them" in my official opinion, but still I lay quite happily in my bed, ears flapping as I pretended not to listen. Squibbles and fights over territorial rights ("right, this half of the writing desk is MINE so move your colour pencils elsewhere!") were rare and far between, and -in hindsight- taught a great deal about the importance of compromise and negotiation. However, later in our teenage years we exchanged gunfire almost daily so starting from then it was a natural choice to have a separate room for both...

EP · Post by EP » Wed Mar 12, 2008 11:51 pm

Any brothers? or 12 kids all girls?

Nope, 13 kids, 12 girls and 1 boy. And guess what the womens position was in those days? One boy inherited half of the estate, and 12 girls inherited the other half. Like in 1970´s cigarrette ad for women: "You have come a long way, baby."

annekmc · Post by **annekmc** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 8:55 am

I think if you have enough rooms, they are better in their own rooms, my 2 girls age 4 and almost 2, spend the whole day together playing and I think that it is best they get the peace in their own room to get a sound sleep and recharge ready for the next day. Both go to sleep about 2 minutes after they go to bed and I am sure that wouldn't be the case if they were in the same room.

Also if one is ill and awake during the night it would keep the other up too.

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