Is not it strange?

Hank W. · Post by **Hank W.** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 12:55 pm

badger2 wrote:do you like song of the china?

**Sponsor:**

mx2106 · Post by **mx2106** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 1:12 pm

Hank W. wrote:
kristiinafin wrote: i feel bad that i even asked cause usually i never ask for anything.
I help before I am asked. Saves time and energy.

you are one of the guys after her on the street, am i wrong?

Vallu · Post by **Vallu** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 1:17 pm

mx2106 wrote:
Hank W. wrote:
kristiinafin wrote: i feel bad that i even asked cause usually i never ask for anything.
I help before I am asked. Saves time and energy.
you are one of the guys after her on the street, am i wrong?

It actually sounds that way, doesn't it?

mx2106 · Post by **mx2106** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 1:20 pm

Vallu wrote:
mx2106 wrote:
Hank W. wrote: I help before I am asked. Saves time and energy.
you are one of the guys after her on the street, am i wrong?
It actually sounds that way, doesn't it?

zoltar · Post by **zoltar** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 1:22 pm

kristiinafin wrote:Before i didnt come to Helsinki only because i didnt want to sit at home and be feeded by him.
Now when im admitted to school, i can have good feeling.
dont own him anything.

Ah, good for you then for coming here for school more than for him :)

There's an old saying [ from an 80s movie... ] and a hand sign that will come in handy for you in the near future. "@#$% You [ show the middle finger ] and the horse you rode in on [ tilt hand 90 degrees forward ]." :)

The dude sounds like a total loser, be happy you found out now.

Vallu · Post by **Vallu** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 1:26 pm

zoltar wrote:
The dude sounds like a total loser, be happy you found out now.

Yes, better now than later, after married and children! Better now!

Hank W. · Post by **Hank W.** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 1:38 pm

mx2106 wrote:[you are one of the guys after her on the street, am i wrong?

No, I don't have such money to go after the "girls on the street", though they come after me sometimes when I am in a suit and tie thinking I am rich.

kristiinafin · Post by **kristiinafin** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 2:19 pm

badger2 wrote:
kristiinafin wrote:Hank! you are very nice and funny!
Vallu: yes im speechless too...
I was all those years independent. I went to work to the bank when i was 19 and still im here and i get my own salary, i pay my bills by myself and support my mother too. Im independent long time ago.
I didnt want money or anything from him. its just now i needed little support, moral or emotional and little help (not even in money cause i would not come if i was not able to pay all expenses myself, i needed him to get the keays and help with advice.).
Now in my heart the door is closed for him.
thats for sure.
pitty, cause i really loved him for him, not for his money.
i wonder sometimes is not it ironic: you move to other country to be closer to someone and when you move, thats when everything ends...
Good at least that i have a goal to study and get work and live my own life.
Before i didnt come to Helsinki only because i didnt want to sit at home and be feeded by him.
Now when im admitted to school, i can have good feeling.
dont own him anything.
do you like song of the china?

Am I missing someting?
whats that?
Never heard... sorry...

kristiinafin · Post by **kristiinafin** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 2:21 pm

Hank W. wrote:
mx2106 wrote:[you are one of the guys after her on the street, am i wrong?
No, I don't have such money to go after the "girls on the street", though they come after me sometimes when I am in a suit and tie thinking I am rich.

Hank, you dont have to pay for meeting "good" girls.
They are paying for themselves!
Hehe.

badger2 · Post by **badger2** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 7:51 pm

kristiinafin wrote:
badger2 wrote: do you like song of the china?

Am I missing someting?
whats that?
Never heard... sorry...

dont worry, bear. i was just being silly.

have you already moved to helsinki?

Oombongo · Post by **Oombongo** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 10:07 pm

well....that's sad to know. Life is a biatch sometimes
In bad situation, you know a person better.

The best thing...You've proven that you can manage really.
I always thought that my in-laws are the worst but your situation...wow

Meri-Tuuli · Post by **Meri-Tuuli** » Sun Jul 30, 2006 4:15 pm

Hei K-Fin....

Sorry to hear that your bf isn't everything that you thought he was. But I can't help but asking, didn't you get any idea that he might be like this before? I mean, you were with him for 5 years, which is a long time to find out what someone is really like, and you'd think that you'd know if he were helpful or not in that time....you sound a touch naive about him to be honest.

Now this sounds abit harsh (I'm sorry if it does!) but could he be having an affair with you? In the sense that he's married or has another long term girlfriend that he lives with?? I mean, that would explain his rather odd behavior towards you regarding helping you move to Helsinki. Obviously then, he doesn't want you to move to Helsinki, because then that would increase his chances of 'getting caught' with you or similar things like that.

Again, I apologise if I am barking up the wrong tree, but its something I wanted to point out.

Personally, I would totally ditch the bloke -- he sounds like he's using you for only one thing.

I mean, he sounds totally weird - what committed/nice boyfriend wouldn't be excited about his girlfriend moving to the same place as him?

kristiinafin · Post by **kristiinafin** » Mon Jul 31, 2006 2:36 pm

Meri-Tuuli wrote:Hei K-Fin....

Sorry to hear that your bf isn't everything that you thought he was. But I can't help but asking, didn't you get any idea that he might be like this before? I mean, you were with him for 5 years, which is a long time to find out what someone is really like, and you'd think that you'd know if he were helpful or not in that time....you sound a touch naive about him to be honest.

Now this sounds abit harsh (I'm sorry if it does!) but could he be having an affair with you? In the sense that he's married or has another long term girlfriend that he lives with?? I mean, that would explain his rather odd behavior towards you regarding helping you move to Helsinki. Obviously then, he doesn't want you to move to Helsinki, because then that would increase his chances of 'getting caught' with you or similar things like that.

Again, I apologise if I am barking up the wrong tree, but its something I wanted to point out.

Personally, I would totally ditch the bloke -- he sounds like he's using you for only one thing.

I mean, he sounds totally weird - what committed/nice boyfriend wouldn't be excited about his girlfriend moving to the same place as him?

1. I didnt know that he would behave in such way because untill now I really didnt need nor ask any help from him. So when you have not done something before, you cant know.
2. About other women. Im not affair for him and he is not using me for "one" thing only, because if he would want to use me for it, he would use. But we have not had sex for 1 year now. even sometimes we see and spend time together, because of something that he did.
3. As for being cought. I dont need to come to Finland to catch him, because we separated for he had finnish woman and i cought him for that in Estonia, didnt need to come for that to Finland.
For now they are separated too, because he doesnt love her, doesnt want her and doesnt need her, even they have a 1 year old baby.
but he left her anyway. He is not married and i hardly believe he will ever get married.
for me and him everything is decided long time ago.
i just needed help in moving, and i asked cause he offered.
nothing else.

Meri-Tuuli · Post by **Meri-Tuuli** » Mon Jul 31, 2006 9:34 pm

Hello again,

Ah well I see. Kind of. Anyway, yes he sounds rather rotten, even now that you are no longer going out. Perhaps he's being spiteful or bitter that the relationship has ended.... and I suppose unless you ended on good terms, its probably not the best idea to ask any of one's ex-bf's to help with anything.... thats just the way it goes I'm afraid.

But to be honest, if you have been going out for the last 5 years, plus the 5 months you have been separated, and he has a baby who is one year old with another woman, then he must have cheated on you at some point in the relationship. Well, that to me is a pretty good hint that he ain't the best boyfriend on this planet, and that perhaps you shouldn't expect him to help you out or anything like that.

If some guy had cheated on me like that, well I wouldn't even say hello to him in the street, let alone ask him for help! I'm on your side, I really am, but I really think you should just forget about him, and get on with your new life in Finland! People are always going to let you down, thats just the way life is I'm afraid. Its obviously not very nice, but judging from the sound of your ex-bf not very surprising really, I'm sorry to have to say.

Kind regards

Meri-Tuuli

kristiinafin · Post by **kristiinafin** » Tue Aug 01, 2006 9:44 am

you are right and asap i realised that, i cought the relashion.
now he calls everyday, wants back..
all things i had to take... even this finnish lady called me many times threaten me that im noone, she is the only one woman in his life... bla bla bla..
i said to her i was very sorry for her cause i knew he would leave her as well. but she didnt believe me.. so now she got her lesson too. and why i was the subject of calling and saying bad things to me????

maybe she was afraid that she stays alone with baby...
wanted to get married probably or something.
ah... good everything is over.

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